This pregnancy limbo thing is driving me crazy….just waiting and hoping. Both excited and scared to death and scared to death to even get excited. I think it is wearing on my mental state. I was really hoping after my BFP I’d stop being so obsessively crazy. Nope. It turned up the volume a bit. These are the Top 5 of my daily freak outs:
1) Constantly over-analyzing my uterus. I get annoyed that it is constantly crampy and weird feeling, and then moments later freak out because it stopped being crampy and weird feeling. My husband keeps catching me staring into space as I try to discern whether a particular cramp feels menstrual-like or maybe I just need to toot.
2) I’m thrilled my two days of migraine went away, and now keep freaking out for not feeling pregnant and feeling too “normal”
3) Being grumpy because nothing fits already and then freaking out because I didn’t look as bloated today and actually lost weight. I’m pretty sure it’s because I no longer get to indulge my wino tendencies.
4) Why aren’t my boobs hurting and doing weird things? They look pretty normal, if not a little bit bigger.
5) Why on earth is that damn progesterone suppository orange? Couldn’t they make it as far away as pink/red as possible? I’d rather see blue in my underpants than a scary “is it pink or orange?” streak. How many months will I be playing TP inspector? and does it come with a badge?
I am 5 weeks 2 days today. I have my first ultrasound in exactly 1 week. I am terrified! And also that day cannot come soon enough. I think after that it will finally seem real.