Do they have to make the ultrasound look so much like a penis?

In case any ladies reading this have yet to have their first internal ultrasound, I hope this pic doesn’t scare you away.  But if you are on the IVF boat than you are more than familiar with getting your insides probed by this phallic tool:

Ultrasound So, not only does it look like a giant penis, but it wears a condom too!  At least they are practicing safe probing. I know, I know, there’s really not much else they could make it look like. An ear of corn would just be weird. But the condom with the little colored head and flared base  just pushes it over the edge.

I snapped this pic on my iPad while killing time drinking 2 huge glasses of water before my mock transfer. They prefer you have a full bladder. I didn’t wholeheartedly agree and thought I’d get away with it but noooo, they used the ultrasound that goes over your belly (it’s the tool with the curved blue top, directly to the left of the magic wand) and checked to see how full my bladder was.

I had to slam to big glasses of cold water before they’d get started. It was tough! I’m not even good at shots. I tried to make a drinking game out of it, but the last time I tried to chug drinks like that was in college.

After I finally got all the water down and they checked me out again, they got started with the Mock Transfer procedure. It was EXTREMELY uncomfortable. One lady squashed down on my very full bladder while the other rooted around my insides. I asked them if anyone ever peed on them and they said “it happens.” I felt like telling them it was about to happen all up in their face.

I’d had IUI done before, which I found quick and painless, so I really didn’t expect this to be much of big deal. But I didn’t have this huge bloated bladder to contend with when doing that. I was expecting some fire hose action if she kept on pressing into me. The speculum went in fine, but the catheter going into my cervix pinched like hell. I actually screamed! I never felt anything like that with my IUI’s. So now they have me good and nervous for the actual procedure. The saving grace was that they said you get a good dose of valium for the actual procedure. I sure could have used that for the trial procedure!

On a good note, they said my uterus and ovaries look good, so at least I got that going for me. All my drugs are arriving today and tomorrow everything gets started!

 

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8 thoughts on “Do they have to make the ultrasound look so much like a penis?

  1. The first time I brought my husband into the exam room, he was a little shocked to see that as well. I still feel a little strange when they put the condom on it!

  2. “..all up in their face.” I love when people write like they talk! And funny how I never thought about it looking like a penis! My internal ultrasounds will never be the same.

  3. It looks like that because the penis naturally came to look like that; it’s the best shape for fitting in the vagina 🙂 see: convergent evolution

    And those things cost tens of thousands of dollars so just think about that next time lol

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